Love and Marriage

Being in a relationship takes hard work. Being in a marriage takes that and then some. Three things that I have learned over the years and would like to stress to you are;

If you know you have been through a traumatic experience and you have not taken the proper steps to ensure that you have fully healed from that experience, don’t bring anybody into your mess. That person doesn’t deserve having to deal with your emotional baggage and you owe it to yourself to heal yourself first to the point where you are able to find your own happiness without even needing to be in a relationship. 

Just because you may have had your heart broken or maybe even decimated doesn’t mean that the person you finally decide to be with doesn’t deserve to have all of you, it’s not fair to you or them. So, if you’re not in the position to give or receive love in its entirety, fall back, just be friends until you are able to give it your all.

And lastly, communicate, even if you have to write daily letters, daily emails, daily text or see a therapist, but you have to communicate because without healthy communication you’ll be sitting around making assumptions about things that aren’t even true or that don’t even make sense. So, do whatever ever you have to do to communicate and if you find that you just can’t get it right then that’s a whole other discussion that you’re going to have to get through because at the end of the day you’ll be doing yourself a great disservice if you can’t speak or live in your own truth.